It's been one of those days...

I have started this blog as a place to honor, remember, and show my love to our sweet baby Bridger. I think about him constantly and try to think about all of the positives. However, today was one of those days that I was tired of thinking about all of the positives and just wanted to hold my baby in arms.

We have been trying hard to get back into our routine. It helps me to stay busy and keep my mind occupied. I will be doing ok until things come up that remind me that Bridger is not here with me. For example, today for playgroup we went to the park that we visited the night before Bridger was born. I had told my sister in law at that park that I was worried about not feeling Bridger move very much. It was a sad reminder... I also saw on a friend's blog who was/is due around the same time as me that she only has 8 days left on her countdown. That would have been me too... A friend sent me a message congratulating me on my beautiful little boy and that she was almost done, and wishing to be done with her pregnancy. Although her comment was innocent and I don't think she knows what happened yet, I read it and WISHED that I WAS still pregnant. I also received the bill from the hospital in the mail today. Just one more sad reminder...

I went and visited Bridger's grave because I just wanted to be close to him. I just sat and cried. Yah, it's been one of those days. I miss my little Bridger boy